I just want to say thank you. Thank you for pushing me away. Without that, I would have never fallen for him. That's not to say I don't think about you once in a while. How I wish to know how you're doing. But we're better off this way.
Thank you for letting me find love.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Sunday, May 11, 2008
III
What do you do when you don't know what to do?
How about when you're so confused, you don't know whether to step up and say something, or let it pass?
When you're doing your best to make sure things are going smoothly and all they seem to be doing is fucking up. When you're so excited for the future, but the person on the opposite end is frustrated. You want everything to be perfect, and here it is, crumbling at your feet. The words lessen and the silence grows. And you don't know what to do. 2 days...that's all that's left between here and there. But you're not even sure if there is where he wants you to be.
That's what happens when the silence grows. Silence is the birthmother of confusion. The less you know, the more you wonder.
Some say you should just leave it alone. It will all work out. Everything will be fine. But you want to scream at them, at him, and tell them it's not fine. Because if it were, you wouldn't be in this mess.
You know you're right...and you know you should just let it go.
Just let it go.
How about when you're so confused, you don't know whether to step up and say something, or let it pass?
When you're doing your best to make sure things are going smoothly and all they seem to be doing is fucking up. When you're so excited for the future, but the person on the opposite end is frustrated. You want everything to be perfect, and here it is, crumbling at your feet. The words lessen and the silence grows. And you don't know what to do. 2 days...that's all that's left between here and there. But you're not even sure if there is where he wants you to be.
That's what happens when the silence grows. Silence is the birthmother of confusion. The less you know, the more you wonder.
Some say you should just leave it alone. It will all work out. Everything will be fine. But you want to scream at them, at him, and tell them it's not fine. Because if it were, you wouldn't be in this mess.
You know you're right...and you know you should just let it go.
Just let it go.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
...thoughts...
So I haven't touched this since like what, October? That's quite a while. This originally started out as a school project. Now...well, I suppose I'll be using it for my own thoughts.
A lot has changed since October. Some good, some bad...well, not so much bad...I've been single for 2.5 months. And I wish I could say it was easy, but it's not. I have guys who just want to use me for sex, and that's not what I want. I am seriously interested in someone, and I'm trying to make that work. I just don't know sometimes...he's rather confusing. But I love the kid...so we'll see how that goes. I wonder if he knows I really do love him...I mean we joke about it all the time, but like, is he serious? Well, I'm sure he's serious...but in what fashion does he mean it? Does he love me like a friend, or does he love me like someone he wants to be with. I'm trying to figure that out...he told me once that he just wanted to be friends, but he's acting like he wants more. And yeah, I've thought about sleeping with him...but up to this point I've been afraid to mess things up between us. He's told me he'd always be there for me. I hope he's just being honest. I doubt he'd lie to me. He has no reason to.
I feel like I'm rambling. But oh well, it's what's on my mind. Well, that, basketball, Jase, and sleeping. I have to work in the morning.
I'll write more later.
A lot has changed since October. Some good, some bad...well, not so much bad...I've been single for 2.5 months. And I wish I could say it was easy, but it's not. I have guys who just want to use me for sex, and that's not what I want. I am seriously interested in someone, and I'm trying to make that work. I just don't know sometimes...he's rather confusing. But I love the kid...so we'll see how that goes. I wonder if he knows I really do love him...I mean we joke about it all the time, but like, is he serious? Well, I'm sure he's serious...but in what fashion does he mean it? Does he love me like a friend, or does he love me like someone he wants to be with. I'm trying to figure that out...he told me once that he just wanted to be friends, but he's acting like he wants more. And yeah, I've thought about sleeping with him...but up to this point I've been afraid to mess things up between us. He's told me he'd always be there for me. I hope he's just being honest. I doubt he'd lie to me. He has no reason to.
I feel like I'm rambling. But oh well, it's what's on my mind. Well, that, basketball, Jase, and sleeping. I have to work in the morning.
I'll write more later.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
St. Valentine's Massacre
I don't normally do this (well, on blogs anyhow), but I wanted to ask that my readers vote for St. Valentine's Massacre to play a show with HellYeah, Otep and Bloodsimple.
St. Valentine's Massacre is a band out of Spring Hill, FL. They are great friends of mine, and I would love for them to make it to do this. They have already had awesome showings at Warped Tour, and won the Rock Solid Pressure Showcase just a few weeks ago. So, here's the link, please vote!
OMR
St. Valentine's Massacre is a band out of Spring Hill, FL. They are great friends of mine, and I would love for them to make it to do this. They have already had awesome showings at Warped Tour, and won the Rock Solid Pressure Showcase just a few weeks ago. So, here's the link, please vote!
OMR
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Welcome :)
My first blog...well, on Blogger anyhow! Yay!
First things first, for the sake of privacy, I'm calling myself "Only Melody Remains". Feel free to call me that, or any variation thereof. I take it from a song by the now defunct Cold. I adore their music ^_^ I attend college, it's my second year. Majoring in Advertising, woohoo! I hope to graduate by 2010, and lately have been contemplating a double-major. It's probably too late though.
The purpose of this blog, you ask? Primarily, for myself (and whomever decides to comment) to discuss music. Old, new, likes, dislikes, etc. I love local music. I think without them, we really wouldn't have music at all. After all, the big bands we know now probably started out as small local bands. I may also put in a random story here and there, just for the sake of writing. I haven't done it in ages, and would love to know what people think.
That's all for now.
||Only Melody Remains||
Post Song: "Ocean" by Cold
*EDIT: To hear the entire song, use this URL:http://mellyrx.imeem.com/music/pF7cVQnh/cold_ocean/
First things first, for the sake of privacy, I'm calling myself "Only Melody Remains". Feel free to call me that, or any variation thereof. I take it from a song by the now defunct Cold. I adore their music ^_^ I attend college, it's my second year. Majoring in Advertising, woohoo! I hope to graduate by 2010, and lately have been contemplating a double-major. It's probably too late though.
The purpose of this blog, you ask? Primarily, for myself (and whomever decides to comment) to discuss music. Old, new, likes, dislikes, etc. I love local music. I think without them, we really wouldn't have music at all. After all, the big bands we know now probably started out as small local bands. I may also put in a random story here and there, just for the sake of writing. I haven't done it in ages, and would love to know what people think.
That's all for now.
||Only Melody Remains||
Post Song: "Ocean" by Cold
*EDIT: To hear the entire song, use this URL:http://mellyrx.imeem.com/music/pF7cVQnh/cold_ocean/
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